Achievement

Recently i went to a seminar. Not really sure what i will get out of it, but it really gave me a change to take some risk and make me feel like ..."wow i can do it" and this seminar is in no way related to what i achieved.......... probably i have created some interest right. If so go a head.. otherwise ditch it.. my way of writing doesnt suite u.

Ok here it is...

I was going up the steps, i realized someone on my right catching my eye... looked at her and my next reaction is... "wow she is really beautiful". Ok, everything is fine, i was supposed to sit on the left end of the hall and she on the right end, so we went to our respective places.

While the seminar is going on.. everytime i look to my right my eye's automatically focuses on her face. to describe it better... like in most movies, the camera just shows a crowded street and zooms in finally to focus on the hero.... Its some thing like that.

It happened the first time: i thought she is really beautiful
2nd time: insideme (Ok yaar she is really beautiful)
3rd time: (what's happening to u, comeon u r not here for this, concentrate on the talk..)

but what to do.... i could not control, so i started looking at her instead of looking at the where i am supposed to.

Suddenly something struck in me.. "how would it be if I say it to her????" My first reaction was "WOW good idea"... Now i am committed to say it to her, trouble started then.

I questioned myself....Can i do it??? How will she react if i tell it to her?? what if she scolds me in front of so many ppl?? .... what not i got every dam question which hindered me from saying it to her.

Finally i made up my mind.... Either u go and say it to her, or admit that u r a coward and never ever say u can do anything.

So made a plan abt how to meet her and say it out.

PLAN: After the talk ends, go out quickly hangout at the entrance. when she comes out, excuse her for 2 mins, tell what ever u want to tell and in the worst case run away from that location..... seems to be funny right.. but bet you its really tought to say it to a stranger.

So as per the plan, after the seminar, i went out i excused my friend that i will be joining him in 10 mins. I was waiting for her. I feel like its already 10mins past, my blood pressure is rising, i am slowly giving up hope that i can do it, even my legs are shivering.... I dont want to do it... at the same time i dont want to accept that i cant do it... Finally, she is out ( unfortunately not single, she is accompanied with 4 of her friends).

She is walking out, i am following her.... Finally i got up the courage to approached her. I want close to her and even before i say "excuse" someone from behind called her and he started introducing his friends to her. I was disturbed, scared... i went off crossing her, as if i dont want to talk to her. The movement i crosses i walked a head a few meters and stopped there. I turned back and was waiting for that stupid to finish his talk with her.

After a while he finished and went off, and even before i woke up and thought of approaching, some one else was talking to her. So i went back to waiting mode again.

I was waiting and waiting.. i got a call from my friend.
friend " where r u??"
me (already nervous and frustrated, literally shouted at him) "i will join u, wait"
I ended the call immediately.

After waiting for a while i realized, she seems to be a very popular person. some or the other one has been talking to her. Finally i decided to approach her in any case.

I took a deep breath, went a head
me: (approached her, will my heart beat at its peak, my legs still shivering, even my hands and even my voice not in my control) Excuse me, can i talk to u for 2 mins???

beautiful: (this is the way i would like to call her) ha (nodding her head)

me: (another deep breath) nothing much, I just want to say "u look really beautiful for me"
(i dont know why, i could not even look at her eyes when i said it)

When i completed saying it, i looked at her again... I was really surprised to see her expression. It was not in the list of expression i thought she would give.

she gave a big exclamation mark on her face, and said "hey!! Thank you". Now i am shocked,

anyway i made sure that i hide my fear and said "Its ok. This is all i want to say and bye".
she acknowledged it and immediately after that i ran away from that place. i met my friend, we went out and while i was starting my bike, i realized that my legs a still shivering like hell.

I still doubt it if i have done this all, but its true i have done it. Its really a big achievement right??... not bcos i have done it, its bcos i could not believe myself that i have done it.

BTW, i have recently acheived one of my wish: i have seen a 3 digit reading on my bikes speedometer last sunday i.e. 15th april 2006. I have seen it twice on the same ride.